From Anger to Hope

Thomas’ story begins in Tucson, but his childhood took him to many different places. “I was born in Tucson,” he says, “but I was raised all over the place… Benson, Holbrook, Snowflake, Tucson… where else? England.”

As he was growing up, Thomas attended 18 different schools. Constant change made it difficult to find stability. “I didn’t have that structure that some kids had,” he recalls. “It was broken up.”

One person, however, became a steady source of love and guidance: his grandfather. Their weekends were filled with fishing trips, attending church together, and serving their community. When their church needed help being built, Thomas and his grandfather were there, working side by side.

After his grandfather passed away, grief slowly turned into anger. Thomas watched the church fail to support his grandmother after everything his grandfather had invested in it. “I saw it as like an attack,” he says. The kindness, generosity, and years of service his grandfather had given seemed forgotten when his grandmother needed help the most.

The experience left a deep wound. For more than 20 years, Thomas carried bitterness toward the church, Christianity, and religion.

Running From Accountability

Life at home was unstable as well. His mother struggled with addiction, rehabilitation, and unhealthy relationships. Looking back, Thomas says he grew up “in recovery” without even realizing it, spending time in AA meetings with his mom and absorbing the struggles surrounding him at a young age.

Eventually, the turmoil at home reached a breaking point. “The first time she kicked me out, I was 16,” he says.

Without stability or direction, Thomas drifted into addiction, criminal charges, and a lifestyle focused on survival. Warrants for drug possession, shoplifting, and trespassing accumulated over time. Looking back on those years, Thomas describes what he now recognizes about his actions.

“I wasn’t running from my problem. I was running from accountability. I was running from my daughter, from taking that responsibility and being the person that I needed to be.”

“God, I Can’t Do This Anymore”

On December 4, 2024, everything came to a head. Thomas went to jail, and for the first time, there were no substances left to numb what he was carrying. The weight of his life came crashing down, and he broke into tears.

“God, I can’t do this anymore,” he cried. “I need a way out. I need to get away from this stuff because it’s killing me. I need to be back in my daughter’s life. I need to be there for my mom… I really need help.”

When Thomas finally stood before the judge, the plan was to release him to his mother’s home under probation. Instead of accepting it, he spoke honestly.

“I have a problem, and I need help. I can’t do it on my own. If I walk out those doors by myself, I’m going to end up back in these cells.”

The court agreed to send him to treatment instead. That decision marked the beginning of a long journey through recovery. After moving through different programs and experiencing both progress and setbacks, CBI connected Thomas with Gospel Rescue Mission.

“January 1, I came here,” he says.

A Safe Place to Heal

Since arriving at Gospel Rescue Mission, something much deeper than sobriety has begun to change. The anger that once defined Thomas’ view of faith has slowly been replaced with something new. He no longer describes his faith as simply religion or Christianity. Instead, he speaks about identity and relationship.

The classes at Gospel Rescue Mission have also given Thomas a new understanding of how God designed the mind and how lasting change takes place. Through the Recovery Program and other classes, he is learning about neurology, healing, and how habits reshape the brain.

One of the things that stands out most to Thomas is what he describes as “a safe place to be triggered.” Rather than trying to avoid painful emotions or difficult memories, he is learning to face them with God and continue moving forward.

Looking back, Thomas says Gospel Rescue Mission has helped him see his story through a different lens.

“Gospel Rescue Mission helps me understand just exactly how I need to proceed in the now, so that the past that I’ve learned doesn’t dictate my future—it informs it.”

Reach—and Let Someone Reach for You

Today, Thomas wants others who are struggling with addiction, homelessness, or hopelessness to know they don’t have to face it alone.

“If you’re struggling, if you feel alone, if you feel like there’s nothing else you can do, come learn. Come get safety.”

Then he offers one final encouragement born from his own experience:

“Reach, and let someone else reach for you. And when they grab your hand and pull you up, be honest with what’s kept you down. Open up. Don’t be afraid to open up. There is safety in the rooms of recovery.”

Thomas’ story is a journey from years of anger and addiction to asking for help, entering recovery, and rebuilding his relationship with God. At Gospel Rescue Mission, he continues to learn how his past can inform his future without dictating it—and his message to others is clear: reach out, be honest, and allow someone to reach for you.